Wardrobe Malfunction: Shopping With Toddler

January 14, 2015

Obviously, this is never going to be a wholly satisfying or relaxing experience but quite often, it’s either drag the little ones along or wait weeks for some alone time that you haven’t already got earmarked for some other self-indulgent activity like the dentist, physio or waxer.

This is Miss L and I at our local Kmart. Note the sultanas on the floor.

That striped dress will feature in a future post.
It is actually hanging up.

Yes I picked them up. As I did the further half a box that were upended in the change rooms at Target.

I’m wearing a Suzanne Grae zip front top from Savers, my best ever pair of dark skinny jeans I bought at Harris Scarfe about four years ago and some jazzy new sparkly silver ballet flats that my sister-in-law gave me.

(That mark is on the mirror, not my pants)

Pretty practical, right?


So we’re standing in the queue at Target and Miss L suddenly cries “Zip!”, leans forward and gives mine a healthy tug downwards. Guess who wasn’t wearing any form of singlet or top underneath?

By comedic coincidence, she has also managed to snag some of the fabric so the zip gets stuck. As I stand in line simultaneously trying to protect my decency and spare others the sight of my daggy old bra while also using both hands to yank the zip up, she happily sprinkles a few more sultanas around the place. 

These I did not pick up. I’m sorry.

Finally, by pulling the zip down even further, I manage to free the fabric and then restore the zipper to its rightful place. As Miss L started up an increasingly demanding alternating request for either dummy or bottle, I managed to complete my transaction (ironically for some new bras to replace the current one) and get out before suffering any further humiliation.

Lesson Learned: When you have an inquisitive toddler at chest-height in the trolley facing you, you are not going to want any form of zipper within their reach and if you do, wear a singlet underneath. 

Have you suffered any kid-related wardrobe malfunctions in public?

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